Well-deserved tributes to Paul Newman

Even with the rightfully due tributes to his handsome looks and excellent acting, I am most impressed with all the tributes to Paul Newman's love of his family and his humanitarian endeavors.

I especially liked the references to his stunning blue eyes--"aquamarine gaze-blazers" (on Slate.com) and "Windex-blue" (in the L. A. Times).

The L. A. Times obituary is especially impressive, and, of course, mentions his "Newman's Own"-based philanthropy:

"As a result of his business success, Newman donated more than $250 million to 1,000 groups, including the Scott Newman Center -- devoted to anti-drug education -- and several Hole in the Wall Gang camps, designed for children with life-threatening diseases, with locations in France, Ireland and Israel as well as the U.S. Every summer, Newman stayed at the original camp in Ashford, Conn., where he told ghost stories and staged shows with other celebrities for children who knew him only as the face on the lemonade carton."

Indeed a life well lived.

(Photo from the trailer for the film Exodus (1960).)

Taking care of yourself, part one

I include entries about personal health and healthcare because so many aspects of our lives are affected by our health--our family lives, our professional lives, and our sense of well-being and self-worth. In the legal arena, health issues affects our finances (possibly causing bankruptcy), our families (like assisted reproduction), and our estates (linking finances and families, such as special needs trusts or powers of attorney).

The New York Times runs excellent articles on health topics, including this recent essay on how we define our health, and this article on using the internet to find abundant health information. The second article includes lists of websites with medical information on general health, diseases, and research.

Also, in terms of estate planning, we often limit our thinking to what happens to our stuff after we die, but we need to remember to give some directions for when we are still living, but may not be able to express our wishes directly. Enter advance directives, the most important of which is the health care power of attorney. Wisconsin has a state form for health care power of attorney, by which an individual age 18 or older may designate someone (the health care "agent") to make decisions on the individual's behalf when the individual is incapacitated (as defined by state law in the document).

But don't stop with just filling out a form. A health care power of attorney is only as meaningful as the conversations you've had with your designated agent. You want your agent to make decisions as you would. So, discuss your wishes and philosophy of medical care with your agent, family, and friends. Even if it is difficult to talk about serious injury or illness that would require your agent to act on your behalf, consider how much harder it would be for your loved ones to try to guess what your wishes would be and who you would want to speak for you.

(Photo by Lee Maguire, used by permission.)

We love our pets... part one

Animal companions enhance our lives in many ways. Consider the many pet photos people happily share in the L. A. Times, for example. By now, nearly everyone has heard of the multi-million dollar bequest Leona Helmsley left to her dog, with billions more designated for a trust for the care of dogs. In the end, a reviewing court allowed the trust, with the ultimate beneficiary of the trust being a pet shelter. A full story about the Helmsley estate appears in the New Yorker.

Artistic expression for all

Here's another fascinating arts story. A college woman with Chrohn's disease created this etherial dress (out of wax paper, no less) and won a national competition and award. She uses her art to cope, both mentally and physically, with her disease. The competition was sponsored by the national organization, VSA arts, which offers numerous arts programs for people with disabilities of all types.

New web resource about Medicare

I have been waiting for the right topic to link to the New York Times excellent series on aging, and here it is! Although this article is not as personalized as some others (check out all the topics at the series webpage), it is a good introduction to the new Medicare website for caregivers.

For the over-65 age group, Medicare pays for certain health care services, mostly hospital and doctor care, but does NOT pay for long-term care. As the article quotes Kerry Weems, the acting administrator of the federal Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, “We should be shouting from the rooftops, as often as we can, that Medicare does not have a long-term care benefit.” (However, in some cases, Medicare will pay for short-term nursing home care if it follows a hospitalization and is recuperative.)

Only after a person exhausts nearly all financial resources, will the federal Medicaid program (for those with low incomes and low assets) cover nursing home care. Even then, Medicaid is biases to nursing home care and typically does not cover other types of care, such as home health care or assisted living arrangements. The Medicaid rules are complicated and vary somewhat from state to state and differ for single persons and married persons, so consultation with an elder law attorney is strongly advised for any planning or qualification questions.

Clinical depression or mere sadness?

Mental health remains in the shadows of healthcare discussions, even a decade after Tipper Gore attempted to give it a national spotlight. Yet, a mental disability can be be just as incapacitating as a physical or developmental disability. Note the array of legal issues that relate to mental illness--possible criminal defense, grounds for involuntary civil commitment, and a basis for special medical and estate planning, to name a few.

Yet, our minds are even more mysterious than our physical bodies when it comes to diagnosing and treating ailments. Sometimes, we aren't even sure what "normal" is. This article discusses the fine line between clinical depression and sadness.

Here is a beautiful story of an amazing psychotherapist who has seen nearly everything--literally. She's 99-years-old, still sees patients, and attributes her longevity, in part, to her belief that "you need to be invested; you have to care about what happens."

(Photo by cheeky needle, used by permisson.)

"We're not letting autism back us into a corner."

In spite of the challenges and frequent (but thankfully, lessening) public misunderstanding or disapproval of associated behavior, families are traveling with their children with autism spectrum disorders. A combination of family coping skills, growing societal awareness, and special travel accomodations creates greater opportunities for the kinds of family vacations that many of us take for granted.

"[W]ith Americans who have disabilities spending $13.6 billion annually on travel in the United States (not including the caregivers and family members who often accompany such individuals) . . . , a small but growing number of tour operators, travel agents and resorts are offering specially geared getaways."

In another story, a family explains how their advanced planning helps a college-bound son with Asperger's syndrome and mental illness. This young man shows great promise in math and science, and his family arrangements give him the extra support he needs to succeed. These stories illustrate how broad inclusion of those with autism spectrum disorder can enhance the lives of those individuals AND the rest of society.

Attorney Barbara S. Hughes, one of the law partners I work with, has created an education power of attorney to assist young adults with disabilities continue to include their parents in their educational decision-making. Here is a short article describing how she developed it, and what it entails. Without such a power of attorney, parents could be excluded from student records or other confidential information and processes after a student reaches the age of majority. An education power of attorney, in similar fashion to a financial power of attorney, adds parental involvement without taking away any of the student's rights or authority.

(Photo by Baston, used by permission.)

The most powerful octogenarians in America

Because my law practice includes elder law, how could I NOT include this story from Slate.com about "80 over 80," the most powerful 80-somethings in the country. Besides the text version, there is a photo feature too. Where else would you find U.S. Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens keeping company with evangelist Billy Graham and Hugh Hefner of Playboy fame. (I know it when I see it.)

Where there's a will, there may be a dispute

Parents always want to help their children, and this impulse often extends beyond the death of the parents. However, a will can be more than a means of passing assets from one generation to the next. Therefore, planning and preparation, including communication with the intended recipients (and also expectant, but non-receiving, recipients) is essential for a will to be honored by all involved.

As a recent New York Times story explains,

"Putting off discussion and then springing an unwelcome surprise in a will can poison the reservoir of family joy that parents want to bequeath to the next generation, resurrecting or exacerbating sibling rivalries, especially in blended families created through divorce or remarriage after the death of a spouse.

"Succession is a natural progression, as old as the concept of private property, yet many parents never bother to tell their children about plans for their estate."

Although the story is a good starting point for effective estate planning and family communication, it fails to fully explore the more difficult, but still common, scenarios where family members have no reason to get along in the first place, such as a spouse and children from a second marriage, and children from the first marriage. Also, will disputes can get ugly fast if there are no direct descendants of the dearly departed, and then nephews, nieces, siblings, neighbors, and friends may all be in the mix of those who inherit and those who think they should.

In addition to the linked story, the New York Times offers this special section on wealth and personal finance.

In another post in the near future, I will look at "decoding" the language of wills and estates, by beginning a glossary of terms.

(Photo by twenty_questions, used by permission.)

Amber waves of grain

This is a familiar mid-summer sight from my childhood in Kansas--wheat fields that stretch to the horizon. My mother's side of the family has been raising wheat for at least four generations.

Now, even wheat has become part of the local-food movement. The New York Times reports that locally-grown wheat produces unique-tasting flour.

"Midwestern wheat has been bred for uniformity and yield instead of flavor or nutrition, they say, and processed for shelf stability. But avoiding commercial flour has been a challenge.
Against a backdrop of concerns over food and transportation costs and with demand for local food growing, small wheat farmers see an opportunity."

Yet, I have a soft spot for the vast fields of "uniform" wheat made into commercial flour. If you are ever in Minneapolis, check out the flour mill museum. For decades, the Mississippi River was the source of power for flour production in the upper Midwest, as well as the shipping route to markets.

And, there are more photos of Kansas wheat fields and harvest here.

(Photo by evercool, used by permission.)

"Virtual twins" show nature wins over nurture

Twin studies always grab the attention of social and medical scientists. This story about "virtual twins," siblings whose parents adopted one and biologically bore one within a 9-month window, fascinates me because of what is says about adoption.

“I expected the virtual twins to be more alike than they were because they had been raised together all their lives,” said Dr. Segal, who has also studied hundreds of pairs of fraternal and identical twins, including dozens reared apart. “Yet they were so much less alike. It gives us another piece of evidence in the whole nature-versus-nurture puzzle.”

For several generations, well into the 1970s, families who adopted children tried to "pass" the child as biological, whether by matching physical features or withholding facts about the adoption. Now, many families celebrate adoption, especially cross-racial or cross-cultural adoptions.

Yet, adoption entails many complex issues, which some families don't fully appreciate until the adoptive relationship has matured.

Obviously, adoption is a much BIGGER issue than I can address here, but check back for further reflections or related stories. Or better yet, share your comments too.

(Photo by Narzissus, used by permission.)

Is this the opposite of a big, fat, Greek wedding?

Move along, nothing to see here...

Nearly anything in society that get big enough creates a negative and opposite reaction. Hence, the anti-wedding. It is not for those who don't want to get married, but for those who think the "Wedding Industrial Complex" has taken over how couples exchange their nuptials. The two woman who began the idea by offering free (anti-)wedding planning services placed a classifed ad reading "We hate weddings. Let us plan yours (free)." In the first five days, they received over 40 responses.

Retire at age 23...

Either times were simpler then or movie stars made truck-loads of money. Here is another obituary that tells a fascinating story. The details of the by-gone silent movie era are almost other-worldly. Yet, the charm and seduction are timeless. Not to mention the fact that sexy, blond, teenage celebrities are nearly a constant in our entertainment culture. Maybe THAT'S the key to the early retirement puzzle.

The "family values" ceiling?

John McCain's pick of Sarah Palin as a running mate has created significant attention, to say the least. Without veering into a full-blown political discussion, one theme is especially interesting to me: Can the Republican party, with its professed emphasis on family values, accommodate a candidate who is a mother with young children?

This New York Times story illustrates the conflict motherhood presents. It seems like the prodominant view of motherhood for many women is still one of primary caregiver for children. An excerpt from the Times:

Many women expressed incredulity — some of it polite, some angry — that Ms. Palin would pursue the vice presidency given her younger son’s age and condition. Infants with Down syndrome often need special care in the first years of life: extra tests, physical therapy, even surgery.

Sarah Robertson, a mother of four from Kennebunk, Me., who was one of the few evangelical Christians interviewed to criticize Ms. Palin, said: “A mother of a 4-month-old infant with Down syndrome taking up full-time campaigning? Not my value set.”

Many women confront glass ceilings in their professional lives, and Nancy Pelosi declared the marble ceiling of Congress shattered when she became Speaker of the House. However, even Pelosi did not run for elected office until her youngest child was a senior in high school.

Is Palin an example of a mother who can "have it all," in essense, being a SuperMom? Or is her nomination to the VP post a recipe for certain failure? Slate.com discusses the "supermom" idea and concludes: "The Sarah Palin candidacy could have been a moment for women to celebrate, in glass-ceiling terms if not policy advances. But it never should have stood for the notion that the only way a woman is going to make it to the White House is if she's the best mom in America first."

Economic recession may be good for your health

In spite of a tendency to forego out-of-pocket medical care, fitness expenses, and healthful foods, "... statistics show that as economics worsen, traffic accidents go down, as do industrial accidents, obesity, alcohol consumption and smoking." The L.A. Times reports that we curb our excessive (and unhealthy) behaviors when economic times are tough.

Yet, the net result may be greater unhealthiness. As far as I'm concerned, I'd rather have a prosperous economy and rely on my own judgment and initiative to keep me healthy.

(Photo by Phil; used by permission.)

Uncertainty surrounds flu vaccines for elderly

The New York Times reports that flu vaccines may not have any effect for senior citizens over the age of 70.

"A growing number of immunologists and epidemiologists say the vaccine probably does not work very well for people over 70, the group that accounts for three-fourths of all flu deaths."

However, in spite of the uncertainty, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention still recommends flu shots to at-risk populations.

Art AND food

Occassionally, I will include items about art or food because I love both. Here is where art and food meet! When I first saw a similar photo in the print Saveur, I had to read the caption to discover that it was actually WATERMELON. Wow! Check out the gallery (Click "Fine-Art Fruit") showing the carving process and a complete cover feature on watermelon (with recipes too).

Say "cheese"

Snapshots are interesting windows into people's lives. Photobooth images are even more interesting as the mix of public and private spaces and a spontaneous moment often with two or more friends.

Check out this story from Smithsonian magazine about a historian's collection and research regarding photobooths in America.

(Photo by Logan Antill, used by permission.)

Del Martin is a shining example...

Del Martin, who married her partner of 55 years this past June, died last week. Often, an obituary tells the story of a person's life with a certain formality, but also with perspective on what was important to that particular person.

I can think of no better way to begin my blog that to pay tribute to a life well-lived, especially with so much dedication to the cause for human equality.